otahkoapisiakii:

lj-writes:

thesixthbennettsister:

ekjohnston:

captainpoe:

 Rey is not nothing # #she was never nothing #and she has so many people #that know and care for her 

IS WHAT I AM SAYING

Kylo also hasn’t witnessed these relationships firsthand. All he’s really seen is her and Finn’s friendship.

The relationship between Kylo and Rey was defined in TLJ by Rey expressing her feelings of loneliness and confusion. He’s not really telling her “you’re nothing and no one cares for you” here so much as “I know you feel lonely and that your place in this story is defined by your family, and I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t matter that you come from nothing. We are kindred spirits.”

He literally told her she was nothing asdjkl if you have to rewrite his line to make it sound better then you’re not working off the canon, just your wishful thinking. RJ himself said he was trying to undermine her confidence and use her humble origins against her.

Like on one hand, these galaxy brain takes on trying to do the mental gymnastics to make Kylo Ren not abusive trash is kinda funny in an annoying way

But on the other hand? I am so scared for these people–particularly young women/girls who date men–who are taking these huge red flags for abuse and turning it into “he needs to be saved. Rey can fix him with her love” rhetoric

I’m not saying you shouldn’t like a character who’s a canon shitheel, but ignoring and willfully misinterpreting canon to the point of Discourse™ to woobiify them can have for real consequences for young folks getting into relationships 

*Oda Mae Brown Voice* You in danger, girl!

(Pedophilia and child sexual abuse mention below)

You are very correct in your fear–in fact, here’s an article by a media academic and csa/incest survivor who discussed how her fandom friends’ romanticization of pedophilia and abuse discouraged her from leaving her abusive pedophile boyfriend.

geekandmisandry:

queer-of-spades:

babylonsabby:

the-black–plague:

peach-course:

Do not support Adam (2018)

I recently heard the news that Adam by Ariel Schrag will be getting a movie. I read the book myself about a year and a half ago and I cannot stress enough just how problematic it is.

Adam is a book about a cis boy pretending to be a trans man in order to trick a lesbian into dating him.

Adam goes to New York to stay with his lesbian sister for the summer, and while he’s there he meets trans men who consider themselves lesbians. At a party he meets a lesbian he thinks is pretty and in order to get into a relationship with her he lies and tells her he’s a pre transition trans man. Let’s make a list of some of the highlights from the book, shall we?

  • At the very beginning of the book his sister and her girlfriend visit home and Adam and his friend spies on them having sex.
  • Almost all the trans men in the book identify as lesbians, implying that they are still women because they haven’t transitioned yet.
  • Adam, a cis straight boy, tells a lesbian that he is a trans man to trick her into dating him.
  • Incidentally Adam is 17 I believe, pretending to be 21. His girlfriend is in the 23 range, I don’t recall exactly.
  • There are explicit sex scenes, the first of which involved Adam using an ace bandage to hold his erection down and using a strapon to have sex with her.
  • In the second one he claims to be using a strapon but is, in reality, using his actual penis.
  • Which is fucking rape.
  • The book doesn’t try to justify this, it somehow manages to do something worse.
  • This second scene is one of the last in the book. After he pulls out he lays down next to her and confesses that he’s not trans. She responds “I know.”
  • She says after they first had sex she started fantasizing about him as a “real guy” (yes quote) and that the image stuck in her mind and she started subconsciously imagining him with a penis.
  • And it gets worse.
  • So he goes back to ohio and she sleeps with other girls (because for some reason she decides not to break up with this cis 17 year old who lied about his identity literally raped her) and one night he gets drunk and calls her a bitch and a fucking whore and whatever, and THAT’S apparently the point she thinks that maybe they should break up.
  • And one day they message eachother to catch up i think maybe he graduated at this point idk but hes planning on visiting his sister in new york and they wanna meet up and
  • She tells him about her new boyfriend.
  • Get ready for it
  • Cis. Man.

So. We have

An underage cishet boy lying about being an adult trans man in order to trick a lesbian into dating him!

A scene in which he actually rapes her!

The lesbian in question becomes attracted to cis men making Adam, essentially, conversion therapy!

Do NOT support Adam (2018)

Ariel Schrag used to sometimes be in my high school for some reason, so I’ve met her in person and let me tell you with just one look at her it becomes obvious that she sees trans men as an advanced form of butch women

Ugh, this is both lesbophobic AND transphobic. Every single bit of this is gross. Just when you thought Hollywood was getting “better” it pulls this shit.

Google Books summary:

“But then he meets Gillian, the girl of his dreams. If only she weren’t a lesbian! And if only she didn’t believe he was really (sort of) a girl.”

Why are things so gross and terrible.

The cover of this book includes the following endorsement by Alison Bechdel: “The sexual revolution is finally over, and Ariel Schrag has won.”

… K alison, whatever you say.

Also according to other reviews it is really racist, including the n word and the phrase “weird Asian pussies”

Also the character described himself as half Jewish and there is someone with a “jew fetish”.

Why do people think Mai and Zuko have a toxic relationship?

attackfish:

Look, there are a sizable number of people who have convinced themselves that Mai raped Zuko during Book Three. There is no logic here. These are people who hate Mai for being in the way of their ship, and have decided based on this that she is evil. This comes down to the idea that there is One Right Ship, and that all other ships are Wrong, and must be proven Wrong to bolster the One Right Ship. This is an absurd and downright frightening mindset, but it’s surprisingly common.

Also she wouldn’t flop over and let him be a jealous and violent asshole, so she must be ~abusive~ and ~toxic~. How dare she have boundaries and not be a doormat, everyone knows you have to let boys do whatever the fuck they like or you’re the abusive one!!!

Nice writeup but disagree on Winn and wonder if you’d classify her as a villain if she were male. Opaka backed the wrong horse in feckless Bareil and Kira was an asshole for letting her sex drive get in the way of wanting the best Kai for Bakker. Also Berman confirmed the pah wraiths “violated” Winn before the end, so yeah, kind of a bad take.

lj-writes:

lj-writes:

Um? This is the woman who was confirmed, over and over again, to have put her ambitions ahead of the good of others, of Bajor, or indeed the universe. She also ummm tried to assassinate her opponent (Bareil)? Which would make anyone a villain? But that’s not close to all of it, you even brought up the pah wraiths yourself–i.e. her last arc in the show, where she was going to burn Bajor down and kill the Prophets because they liked Sisko better than her. I’m not sure what Berman meant by violation, certainly Dukat raped her by deception and no one deserves that. Here’s some news, though: suffering a wrong does not in itself make you a good person.

@kyberfox The salt of Dukat stans in response to his story is a major reason to love DS9 as a show, if not the fandom. But eeewwww in addition to presiding over genocide (like that’s not enough) Dukat is a sexual predator and a serial rapist and he has stans, wow. I don’t think his history of rape was as blatant in the earlier seasons though it was certainly implied, but even then he was creepy as hell pursuing Kira. Terrible as Winn is, I’d be hard-pressed to say she’s worse than Dukat and felt awful at how she was tricked by him. And that’s another long rant on how misogynistic the show was toward women who dared to enjoy sex.

@seguun Well, maybe. He certainly had flashier material, more expected material for a bad guy/protagonist’s rival. On the other hand, Winn’s brand of evil is more understated and also more… prosaic? I’d call her more corrupt than Dukat’s brand of out-and-out evil. Hers was a more nuanced look at corruption, not like Dukat’s which comes about more rarely through a perfect storm of power, policy, and personality–the sort of evil that doesn’t happen unless there is a severe power disparity, unless there is a decision to use that disparity for destructive exploitation, and unless there are (and there always are) abusive personalities to carry out that exploitation.

Winn’s brand of evil, or corruption, on the other hand, can happen in a broader range of situations. In fact, Dukat was at his most Winn-like when he turned internally toward Cardassia, as a self-serving politician, than when he was dealing externally with Bajor as a past colonial overlord. Like Winn, Dukat resisted foreign occupation, then supported/led a civilian government. These are positives as far as they go, but we also know that both Winn and Dukat were ultimately serving themselves. I can think of a lot of politicians who would be Dukats if given the chance, but in most situations they have to settle for being Winns. Dukat himself was more like Winn in Cardassia between withdrawal from Bajor and the Dominion takeover.

I think the banality of corruption is one reason some don’t see Winn as a villain and thought Dukat was being redeemed–because these characters were in the normal work of politics, whether in operating government domestically or fighting against foreign threats. The thing is, of course, they were using the workings of government to lift themselves up and serve their own ends at the expense of their peoples. Dukat again does the more obviously evil thing by giving Cardassia to the Dominion, but Winn, too, chose her advancement over the good of others and of Bajor throughout the show.

Their parallels are shown in their relationships with Sisko, too. Dukat may have hated and opposed Sisko openly while Winn was in a position where she had to give lip service to and be friendly with Sisko as the Emissary, but it’s clear from early on that she hates Sisko and thinks she deserves the love and reverence he gets.

It’s deeply fitting and satisfying then, that despite their differences, and indeed their enmity, Dukat and Winn end up at the same place at the end of Season 7–serving the pah-wraiths and destroying Bajor. One is an open racist and unrepentent genocidaire while the other is the spiritual leader of Bajor sworn to defend the world and its faith, yet they reach the same conclusion: Bajor, and the Prophets, deserve to be destroyed for not exalting and appreciating them enough. Dukat’s evil and Winn’s corruption may have taken different forms, but they were both equally destructive in the end and, indeed, Winn’s role was more crucial than Dukat’s.

Winn’s real final arc begins not when she is cruelly deceived and violated by the pah-wraiths and Dukat, but when she learns of the deception and responds to it. Rather than look back on her life and her faith and withdraw to make some much-needed changes in her life and heal from the spiritual and emotional trauma of what she was put through, she yet again decided power was more important and made the ultimate, fatal choice.

Winn’s story was different than Dukat’s, certainly, but in many ways I thought it was a more universal story with greater subtlety and nuance. I think together they made for a more rounded look at the nature of evil in politics.

Nice writeup but disagree on Winn and wonder if you’d classify her as a villain if she were male. Opaka backed the wrong horse in feckless Bareil and Kira was an asshole for letting her sex drive get in the way of wanting the best Kai for Bakker. Also Berman confirmed the pah wraiths “violated” Winn before the end, so yeah, kind of a bad take.

lj-writes:

Um? This is the woman who was confirmed, over and over again, to have put her ambitions ahead of the good of others, of Bajor, or indeed the universe. She also ummm tried to assassinate her opponent (Bareil)? Which would make anyone a villain? But that’s not close to all of it, you even brought up the pah wraiths yourself–i.e. her last arc in the show, where she was going to burn Bajor down and kill the Prophets because they liked Sisko better than her. I’m not sure what Berman meant by violation, certainly Dukat raped her by deception and no one deserves that. Here’s some news, though: suffering a wrong does not in itself make you a good person.

@kyberfox The salt of Dukat stans in response to his story is a major reason to love DS9 as a show, if not the fandom. But eeewwww in addition to presiding over genocide (like that’s not enough) Dukat is a sexual predator and a serial rapist and he has stans, wow. I don’t think his history of rape was as blatant in the earlier seasons though it was certainly implied, but even then he was creepy as hell pursuing Kira. Terrible as Winn is, I’d be hard-pressed to say she’s worse than Dukat and felt awful at how she was tricked by him. And that’s another long rant on how misogynistic the show was toward women who dared to enjoy sex.

Nice writeup but disagree on Winn and wonder if you’d classify her as a villain if she were male. Opaka backed the wrong horse in feckless Bareil and Kira was an asshole for letting her sex drive get in the way of wanting the best Kai for Bakker. Also Berman confirmed the pah wraiths “violated” Winn before the end, so yeah, kind of a bad take.

Um? This is the woman who was confirmed, over and over again, to have put her ambitions ahead of the good of others, of Bajor, or indeed the universe. She also ummm tried to assassinate her opponent (Bareil)? Which would make anyone a villain? But that’s not close to all of it, you even brought up the pah wraiths yourself–i.e. her last arc in the show, where she was going to burn Bajor down and kill the Prophets because they liked Sisko better than her. I’m not sure what Berman meant by violation, certainly Dukat raped her by deception and no one deserves that. Here’s some news, though: suffering a wrong does not in itself make you a good person.

There are shippers in the GoT fandom who defend all of the incest in the show. Like Jon/Daenerys and the Lannister twins. They also ship the hell out of non-canon incest ships like Jon/Sansa. If the fandoms merge, it will be so much worse than the R*ylo bullshit we already see. I won’t be there to support it. Fuck KK for ruining something that has been so loved for so long by people all over the world.

My interest in the books dropped off circa the fourth novel, but GRRM at least made it clear that the incest between Jaime and Cersei was narcissistic and destructive, and the sexual abuse of Danny by her late unmourned brother was exactly that, abuse. (But then her Mongol Barbarian stereotype husband raped her repeatedly and she holds him up as a paragon of manhood, and burned a woman alive after said woman justifiable killed him, so uh… fuck that entire series, basically.) And fans, particularly of the TV show, run with that to incest now being the coolest thing in the world. Just ugh, no.