Reylo fandom is literally just Zutara fandom all over again, the Master Checklist:

tarisilmarwen:

1. Immediate fixation on the moderately attractive tortured “bad boy” antagonist character and rush to ship him with the closest available female protagonist. CHECK.

2. Downplaying/excusing antagonist’s misdeeds especially in regards to the way he treats female protagonist.

CHECK.

3. Ignoring/leapfrogging over said female protagonist’s much more likely actual love interest and coming up with bullshit reasons/excuses for why he’s actually the abusive/toxic one!

CHECK.

4. Cropping/editing out the more prospective love interest from photos/footage in order to create romantic moments for their ship, because as of yet none exist.

CHECK.

5. Claiming purple as their ship color.

CHECK.

6. Weird obsession with red/blue color symbolism and super-strong genetically superior offspring. (”Steambabies”, “Stormbabies”, “Forcebabies”)

CHECK.

7. “English Literature” majors crawling out of the woodwork to spew 5000K+ words of bullshit “proving” why their ship is obviously, objectively, canon endgame, typically by over-microanalyzing literal seconds of footage or making false comparisons to tropes/relationship archetypes in other completely unrelated properties.

CHECK.

8. Somehow, in the middle of all this super-detailed analysis, completely missing the characters’ actual thoughts and feelings and the much more obvious hints towards the other much more likely romance.

CHECK.

9. Beauty and the Beast comparisons.

CHECK.

10. Romeo and Juliet comparisons.

CHECK.

11. Pride and Prejudice comparisons. (WHAT IS PEOPLE’S FIXATION WITH THIS ONE?! I’VE READ THE BOOK IT’S NOT THAT GREAT.)

CHECK.

12. Attempts to compare their ship to other canon ships in the same fandom despite them not actually being alike.

CHECK.

13. Mistaken belief that their rival ship is boring and has no conflict because it’s a fluffy feelgood ship stemming from friendship rather than the enemies to lovers trope.

CHECK.

14. Mistaken belief that their ship would be something “fresh” and “new”… despite points 8, 9, 10, 11, and 12.

CHECK.

15. Misunderstanding Yin/Yang symbology.

CHECK.

16. Romanticizing a plot event where the antagonist has the female protagonist captured and restrained and is plying her for information.

CHECK.

17. Romanticizing the enmity between the two parties and claiming it is “sexual tension”, instead of animosity, indifference, and hatred.

CHECK.

18. Chronic inability to remain in their own lanes/spaces by hijacking general threads and crosstagging.

CHECK.

19. Every word out of a writer/director/actor’s mouth is indisputable proof in favor of their ship, even if they are explicitly denying the ship being a thing.

CHECK.

20. Literally everything is hidden proof of their ship. Everything. (The freaking Porgs?! Really?!)

CHECK.

21. Easily deceived by misleading advertising/trailers.

CHECK.

22. Nuclear bitchfit meltdown when their ship inevitably, predictably, does not happen. PENDING.

…

I… I swear I’m in deja-vu world.

Oh my god, I knew there was overlap in the fandoms and a lot of similarities but i never realized just HOW much of a Zutara 2.0 the Reylo fandom is.

alyruko:

power couple, tlj version

rizahmad:

this is the dysfunctional skywalker family unit i deserve! FINN SKYWALKER IS WHAT I DESERVE!!!!!

calrissians:

oscar isaac writing his trans finnpoe fic on ao3: and then they had a beautiful daughter an tifa dameron and they-

docgold13:

Star wars The Last Jedi – Rose paper cut-out

porglets:

People are all about claiming the Skywalker lightsaber calling to Rey doesn’t mean she’s a Skywalker but then turning around and insisting Kylo deserves to get the lightsaber by the end of the trilogy because it’s his “birthright.”

After a certain point John has seemed to debunk Finnrey, and now he debunks Finnpoe and Finnrose. Why?

Well obviously it’s because Finnlo is endgame. Nah, he didn’t debunk a thing. In both interviews he was consistent in saying the character is not currently prepared for a romance and needs to figure himself out first. That’s the point of stories, character growth especially for the protagonists.

thekesselrun:

Kelly Marie Tran sorting Star Wars: The Last Jedi (2017 dir. Rian Johnson) characters into Hogwarts Houses.

I’m riding hard on the Finn Kenobi theory, do you have a preferred theory on Finn’s parentage? I’m 100% convinced Rey is a Skywalker so I barely debate those kinds of theories

diversehighfantasy:

Of all the Finn parentage theories, I like son of Sana Starros or son of royalty we haven’t met yet (though the Prince Finn “leak” was a case of wookiepedia mistaken identity).

Sana seems plausible because she was introduced after Finn in the comics, similarly to how Poe’s parents were introduced. And, as I’ve seen Finn Starros proponents point out, LF made sure the fans heard about Sana by introducing her as Han’s wife, which was guaranteed to cause a newsworthy stir.

Finn’s father, I don’t know. I thought Sana and Luke had a shippable thing going in the comics, but if Finn’s a Skywalker and Rey is a Solo, they’re first cousins, which seems like a copout way to avoid Finnrey controversy (though Finn being Luke’s biological son would be at least as controversial). But, at least, if Finn and Rey are related, Rey and Kylo are too by default, so it wouldn’t be all bad. But a bit too convenient.

Lando, no. Just because when John was announced, people were like, “he’s prolly related to Lando.”

And it’s not Han. Even if Han and Sana’s past was sexual, the past was before A New Hope, long before Finn was conceived.

Doctor Aphra? Yes! But not likely. Or is it…?

Finn:sends kyle a selfie with the caption I lived bitch

finn-cassian:

Kale, looking as pale as Christmas past: b-but I sliced your back! You should be dead!!

Finn, looking fly as a motherfucker, with his black dress shirt, black slacks and a custom made cape from Lando Calrissian himself: