The Force Awakens: So Snoke is out hiding somewhere, on a secret ship that’s constantly moving so no one knows where it is, and he only talks to people via hologram

The Last Jedi: Which is why his ship is going to show up in the second movie and Rey will be able to find it no problem and a random hacker knows it like the back of his hand for some reason and calls it “Old Man Snoke’s Boudoir”

The Last Jedi: Oh and Snoke and the ship are both going to get cut in half and be destroyed

The Last Jedi: Man this worldbuilding is fun I love creating mystery

Episode IX: Mystery like “how does this make sense?”

The Last Jedi: Exactly!

Episode IX: Mind if I ignore that mystery and just do my own thing?

The Last Jedi: Of course! That’s what I do!

STAR WARS: Episode VII


THE BLOOD OF WARRIORS

It is an odd time for the Organa Family. Former-General Leia Organa has entered her fourth year as the Chancellor of the New Republic’s Senate. Her position is far from secure as the opposing parties have been vocal about her oversight. Though war is at an all time low, there has been a recent rise in missing children, both in the Republic and Mandalorian space.

With support from the New Republic Intelligence Services, Leia has devoted most of her time to focusing on this crisis. Unfortunately, this effort has yielded no results, and drawn the ire of the Mandalorians. The ungoverned clans have not taken kindly to either the loss of children or the breaches of privacy.

Espionage agent Captain POE DAMERON has followed a secret lead to Hosnian Prime. Should the information prove reliable, the star pilot may have found the source of the missing children. With the assistance of his friend, BB-8, Captain Dameron is on the case…

Chapter I: The Unkar Plot

Poe Dameron’s Wall-Watcher exited out of hyperspace above Hosnian Prime. The first time Poe saw it he mistook it for Coruscant. The atmosphere was equally stained with lights, but the color was different. Still, who could blame him for his confusion?

“Got some memory in your banks, buddy?” Poe asked his floating companion as they entered the atmosphere. BB-8 responded with a disgruntled beep, not unlike one her dad would quip.

“I know, I know,” Poe responded. “Just make sure you’re rolling.”

The Wall-Watcher, cloaked in its field, aligned itself with a night-club tower. Poe’s target was on the top floor, and, unsurprisingly, seedy bars with illegal activities didn’t like to permit New Republic agents to snoop around the premises. Luckily, Poe had other means of entry.

As the Wall-Watcher magnetized to the wall, the hood popped open, and Poe, dressed in civilian clothes, began his ascent. His backpack doubled as a silent jet pack, and BB-8 followed quickly behind him. A quick landing on the balcony would only seem suspicious if the balcony wasn’t reserved for the drunkest clients. Poe made his way into the establishment.

If there was one thing for which he had to give his enemy credit, it was style. The night-club, known as The Niima Outpost, was both vibrant and subtle. The neon lights were constant, but the sparkle-pop tunes from the live band offset the more garish aspects of the club. Poe approached the bar.

A handsome Duros immediately bought him a drink. Poe thanked the man and downed the ale. Before his glass touched the counter, the bartender had moved over to another customer. Activating his contact lens thermoscope, Poe found three heat signatures in the kitchen, shorter than the chef. Just as he expected.

“So, what’re you doing here?” The handsome man asked Poe. “Business, or pleasure?”

“A little bit of both,” Poe responded. As he readied his pocket-pistol and braced his shoulder against the kitchen door. “Thanks again for the drink!” Poe’s jacket charged an electric shock disabling the door’s cyber-security system. The force of his shoulder was enough to break the physical lock. Poe quickly dispatched two stunning bolts to approaching security guards. The chef, a large Crolute man, had been preparing a meal, and quickly flung the contents of the hot pan at Poe. Dodging the steaming sauces, Poe dove behind the bar. As he rose, he saw the chef pointing a knife at one of the patrons that had run in to investigate.

“Drop your gun,” the chef commanded, “and get out of my bar.” Poe lowered his pistol to the floor.

“Easy,” he said. “No need to take things out of hand.” Hearing her cue, BB-8 activated her magnet and swung towards the chef’s knife. With the patron free, Poe delivered a flooring knee, ending the fight.

“Well,” he said to BB-8. “Do you think this is enough to call the local authorities?”

——

The Hosnian Police Force had responded to Poe’s call. The officers were happy to have something to do besides prosecuting parking violations. The Niima Outpost had been suspected for months, but was built like a fortress. Fortunately, the New Republic had better technology.

Poe was being thanked by a pair of parents of one of the children. BB-8 waited for a pause in the conversation to interrupt with a notification. Poe excused himself and walked away. BB-8 flipped her projector topside and landed in Poe’s hand. A fully-colorized hologram of Chancellor Organa flashed to life.

“Ah, Captain Dameron, I take it your mission was successful?” The Chancellor asked.

“Well, yes and no,” Poe returned. “We definitely busted a slave ring. So, that’s great news. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like the one we were after.”

“Well, as much as I would like to celebrate, I’m afraid we have another lead for you. How soon can you meet us on New Alderaan?”

“Us?” Poe asked. This sounded like a joint mission. Did that mean what he thought? “Uh, yes, Chancellor. We can get there in less than a day.”

“That’s great,” Leia responded, already distracted by her aide, Armitage. “May the force be with you, Captain.” The light of the hologram flickered off as BB-8 returned to her floating position. Poe and BB-8 made their way back to the ship, being met with thanks and congratulations along the way. It was days like this that Poe loved his job.


L.J.’s note: Here are the designs for Poe (link), BB-8 (link), and Poe’s Wall-Watcher (link) in this universe, also created and submitted by Moth!